Calling all who love inflicting Pain!

As many know, as part of the Gym programme I'm involved in, there is a final photo shoot in 3 and a half weeks! For the photo shoot, I thought it would be a unique experience to do the full "Body for Life" pose at the end showing a very big comparison between the first photo and the the end result. As a result, I need three things.

1. A haircut, I made a promise to cut my hair for the final shoot.
2. A number of sessions in the sunbed, all the other participants are fully tanned up for their final photo.
3. A Wax.

The first two I can do relatively easy, however for the third I will need a little help.

So I am putting the SOS out there for anyone who is skilled in the craft of inflicting pain and suffering (so probably someone who is married...) and would be willing to do the honors of helping me with this. I have never done anything like this before so my degree of understanding is limited, but I think I have a high tolerance for pain so I'm open to any ideas.

If you know how to and are willing to wax/extract hair from the arms/legs/back/chest/shoulders (and I'm not desperate enough for Steve Jaeger to use his epilady yet) then I need to hear from you ASAP because I need to start Sun Bedding soon and it will be more effective without the rug.

The challenge has been set!